I know I was brave. I know I put on my best smile. I know I was resourceful in saving them for another time, and acting like they hadn’t hurt my feelings. I know I pretended my pride was in tact. But after my victory over the Oat Groat yesterday, I couldn’t help but be reminded of my Collard Green defeat. I was embarrassed by a Collard Green leaf, and I needed to change that story. So I gathered my courage, collected my determination and went and purchased an entire bunch of Collard Greens, all the while grimacing, remembering…the incident. I knew I needed a method to the madness, and so I decided to forgo the recipe books, leave google alone, and check the Southern ancestry at the door. I’d use my own mind and soul to make a delicious plate of raw Collard Greens. Fifty/fifty chance really, but I figured I wouldn’t have to tell anyone what happened if I failed, because everyone thinks the greens are in the freezer! Lie. I mean there are greens in the freezer. Still, I didn’t feel good about it, but I needed a back-out plan!
I washed, I chiffonaded, I separated, I drizzled, I marinated, I weighted. I weighted with a brick, an actual brick. I purposefully, and consciously opened the crisper drawer, put in a bag of marinating Collard Greens, and put a brick from my balcony on top of it. I was out to win. And ladies and gentlemen, tonight, I do declare, I made the best raw Collard Green salad there ever was. Another victory under the old belt, this time, from an unexpected foe.
Jinji’s Collard Green Redemption
- a bunch of collards, chiffonade very fine
- equal parts lemon juice, olive oil, braggs apple cider vinegar, braggs amino acids
- a few shakes of cayenne
- a few shakes of paprika
- some pepper
- and a brick, or heavy weight
- 1/2 an avocado
- some soaked nuts
- some plump raisins
- thinly sliced red onion
- some carrot
- thinly sliced, seeded roma tomato
- thinly sliced apple–about half an apple
Combine everything through the pepper. Weigh it down with a brick in the fridge overnight. Combine with the remaining ingredients for dinner the next day, give a squeeze of lemon, and taste the sweet taste of Collard redemption! ENJOY!!